At the risk of sounding like a cynical single woman, I wanted to post something I’ve wondered about for a long, long while. I joined the organization I currently work with eight years ago (!!). I did my training in a semi-comfortable location in the USA and attended conferences packed with lots of young people of all shapes and sizes eager to “Go!” and serve where God has called them. We heard people serving from all areas of the world in all areas of the world, challenging us to take up the places where no one or few people are serving.
Tonight I sat around the table at our single girls’ house. There are six of us here and one currently out the country. The two families and the one single guy live at the other house. We were talking about the ratio of single men to single women in these parts of the world. Many of us have served in other areas and as we “compared notes” we realized, us single women DRASTICALLY outnumber the single men. In this country in my organization, it’s currently 2 single men and 14 single women, another location: 17 single women, 0 single men, you get the picture. It seems the further away I get from developed nations, the less men who are “workers” I see. And yet when I listen to M’s theory in classes or seminars or read books on it, most strategies are geared towards men, especially in predominantly Mus. parts of the world.
My question is, “where are the men?” Why is it that very few take up the challenge to go to the hard places, and yet single women seem to flock to those areas? And, men….don’t you realize how many amazing, marriageable women there are on the field…ones that aren’t afraid of the icky spiders or walking through mud but yet still want to have a hero in their lives and someone to care for them? Women who are sold out and are going to serve Jesus with or with out you?
Of course, I wish I could objectively ask these questions so people don’t point and go “ah yes…she just turned thirty and is now starting to get desperate and bitter.” I’m not. But, I’m just curious. And I’m wondering if maybe we should start championing strategies that focus on women, especially since we make up the majority of the workers in remote places. I have heard it said that Mus. women are the largest unreached people group in the world. Maybe that’s why so many women are taking up the call…because it is definitely on the heart of God.
But if you are a single man, sitting at home on your computer, wondering what to do with your life that will make a difference in this world...I could offer advice and make a few suggestions. I know this nation would welcome you with open arms.
8 comments:
We have the same "issue" in our organization. My husband's theory as to why there aren't more men on the field is that the world is set up to fulfill and enslave men to simple passions--sports, family, jobs, success, entertainment...they are constantly distracted. They don't have the time to engage in deeper things because they can be swept up in these temporary things so easily. That's HIS theory. We too pray for more Godly men to come and serve with us.
I've been wondering about this for some time too- just looking for a guy who knows how to serve others. I attended a very interesting seminar on the "feminization of Jesus Christ" and that actually made some sense- Jesus is too "girly" which turns me off too. just an idea.
Amen sister! Men are certainly missing out on living a life of adventure and challenge, and meeting some awesome women, by sitting at home! I have so many great, fantastic, caring and loving single friends who would make wonderful companions and soul mates, but are not willing to give up their passions and calling to stay at home and be "easily" available.
Good post - will be forwarding it on! I know that the majority of Peace Corps volunteers are women, too.
Same here in Quito. At my school there are 13 single women and 3 single men. I think it's just that more women than men are willing to make the sacrifices necessary to serve the Lord overseas. Not enough stepping up going on with men. (of course, on a somewhat less kind note, I secretly think it's because women are tougher than men, but I hate to sound like an embittered single 30 year old... :) But seriously, sometimes I want to shout at the Christian male population "SUCK IT UP, CUPCAKE! Get your act together and go serve God! We can't do it all ourselves!!"
I was reading in a book by Elisabeth Elliot once, in which she responded to questions from other believing women. One of the women asked a question similar to this about the lack of men in international outreach. The woman, who served in East Asia, wrote that she prayed for a husband to come who had the same heart for the work. She also said she believed the Lord heard her prayer and answered her. She believed the young man, whoever he was, heard God's call and did not obey.
i don't think it's just phenomenon of overseas workers, it's also reflected in the church population in america. which makes sense. if there are fewer men in church (theoretically representing fewer male believers), there will be fewer men sent. i believe, to a degree, that there should be a healthy re-emphasis on masculinity in our culture.
but i also love your question about why more m. material isn't written with a more gender neutral / feminist perspective.
I don't want to be the spokesman for all the single men out there, but I'll add my 2 cents.
I think it's a blend of all these. There's still this traditional ideal of what a "man" is - leader, competitor, breadwinner - that distracts us from God's call so we don't obey. There's a burden of responsibility men have (or think they have) that prevents them from taking on "frivolous" pursuits such as mission work. It's taken me 10 years to shake off the good grades/college scholarship/stable job expectations of my parents.
(Found your blog through the Krouches'.)
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